I’m learning what life’s like as a Mama of a 2-year old! You can read Part 1 of my “2 Years as Mama” journey here. For Part 2, read below 🙂

I Wish I’d Become a Mama Sooner

SO MUCH in life makes sense once you become a parent. I figured it would be a paradigm shift, I just had NO IDEA it would be the single biggest one I’ve ever experienced (outside of following Jesus) — way bigger than marriage was (& marriage was huge!).

Once you have a child, so much of what you thought mattered in life suddenly seems silly & small & selfish & irrelevant. You start to learn the real meaning of sacrifice — of LOVE — of putting another person’s well-being in front of your own. Sure, you’ve done that throughout your life in smaller doses with loved ones, family & friends, coworkers, & certainly your spouse — but N.O.T.H.I.N.G can compare to the sheer self-denial that comes with a little person needing you alldayeverryyyyydayyyyyyy for years on end! haha 🙂

It’s a beautiful, HUGE responsibility!!! It seems so fun at first, but then your life begins to revolve around naptimes & avoiding tantrums & tuning into your child’s unique personality/likes/dislikes.

Suddenly you’re packing food everywhere you go & doing diaper changes at inconvenient times & calming meltdowns in the store where 1 parent rushes out to the car while the other checks out. Your perfect plans often get scrapped by sudden sicknesses at the worst times.

Every day seems like a never-ending playdate, meeting up with other parents & kiddies! {These are fun for sure, but sometimes mommy just wants to be at home! Or socializing without revolving our schedules around little people}.

The funniest & most ironic part is that as soon as you’re away from your child, you miss them like CRAZY. You want them to be there with you!! You look through photos on your phone, laugh at silly videos of them, & realize how crazy fast they grow up. Then they come home — or wake from their nap — & you sigh because you know your free time is up & you never feel like you did enough with it.

Young Motherhood is Good for Us ~ Don’t Delay it!

I wish I’d become a Mama in my 20’s. I would’ve understood much more about the real meaning of life, wouldn’t have struggled so much with my purpose & identity, & would’ve valued being a woman a whole lot younger than I did.

I also believe having kids when you’re younger & more pliable — physically, emotionally & mentally — makes for less bumps in the road of parenting. You’re less likely to be set in your schedule or a bunch of other things, & you’re more resilient when you’re younger.

And let’s be honest: You’ll (likely) experience increased fertility {boy, did we struggle here! For nearly 3 years} & have easier pregnancies, labor/deliveries & recovery times than your older-&-wiser friends 😉 As a young & energetic mama, I believe it’s easier to handle the mega-stresses of parenting better whilst not sleeping & eating leftover chicken nuggets & apple slices for your ‘meals’ lol 🙂

The reality of parenting is that it’s HARD ON YOUR BODY, LADIES!! The younger you are, the easier you can bounce back from all that it requires!

Also, the younger you are when you learn what your body was created for, the more confident you’ll be. You’ll realize how trivial our culture has made womanhood — and truly how much BIGGER & MORE AMAZING being a woman is than you ever knew!!

You won’t let celebrities or women’s magazines or Netflix tell you that women are just here for appearances & such. Once you’ve created a human being, birthed & nurtured them with your very life — you’ll understand the true meaning of why you’re here! And what the reality of being a woman is all about.

You’ll be a better daughter, friend, sister, & member of your community because you’ll know how to encourage other women, support them, & identify with them.

Becoming a mom is like joining an amazing sisterhood that’s been right under your nose your whole life — yet has alluded you up until this point. I’m so glad to be a part of it!! I only wish I’d joined years ago in my 20’s ~ I’d have years more experience of this wonderful journey called “Mom Life” & numerous little ones by now! 🙂 🙂 🙂

This is not written to condemn us ladies who didn’t have babies til we were older. It’s meant to beckon you to not postpone 1 of life’s most beautiful, exhilarating, joyful gifts. I’ve NEVER heard someone say they regret having kids… but I’ve heard MANY say they regret not having them or waiting too long to get started.

Take it from this late bloomer that it’s better to dive in when you’re “not quite ready” than to wait til all the “perfect” pieces are in place & realize you missed your window of opportunity. The freeing truth is this: Your body isn’t fertile forever. I would love to hug & gently encourage every woman to not delay the incredible gift of having children!! I don’t mean RUSH it — I simply mean to listen to the Holy Spirit’s gentle nudges when He says “it’s time”. I wish I had. I would’ve saved myself years of heartache had I heeded His voice! ♥

You’ll Understand God’s Love in a Whole New Way

Becoming a mother & learning to sacrificially love someone other than yourself is just… incredible. It’s such a deep love, pure & one that doesn’t seek anything from the other.

Unlike marriage, which can come with its own expectations, motherhood (& fatherhood) is a journey in life that isn’t always reciprocal. Amazingly, however, is that you’ll discover the greatest joys of your life when you’re DEAD tired & nursing your wee baby in your underwear haha, when you haven’t showered in a couple days & haven’t slept a full night (or eaten a hot meal/drank a hot coffee) in basically a year. You’ll find a reservoir of love bubbling up for your child from deep inside — laughing & marveling at their funny antics, their unique personality, their growing bodies, & their daily milestones!

Many times, you’ll look down at this crying little person you & your hubby created & be all like — Wow. In love. Forever. Yet this little guy or gal will be putting you through some of the greatest tests of your life!! {Mind you, we’re only 2 years in so I can’t imagine how the next decades will be!} 😀

God’s love for us is like this. He loves us without reason besides the fact that He made us in His image — just like our kids are in ours. He delights in all our little milestones, our daily rhythms, & taking care of us. He gently guides & holds & feeds us. He speaks soothing words to us. He is both our Mother & our Father — as Scripture says.

I LOVE the images of God as a warrior, strong & going to battle for us… but oh my! How incredible to hear how He’s like a mother hen with His feathers protecting us, a Shepherd gently guiding & holding His young, & a Mother nursing us at His chest.

When you become this to someone else — your precious child — you’ll be forever changed. You’ll understand God’s word & His love for you & everyone else much differently.

It’s also opened my eyes to how perfectly I was created!! How each part of my body spent months forming in my mom’s womb & then years growing to full maturity… so I should honor & LOVE my body! It’s also made me want to do the same with others even moreso — to respect their bodies & marvel at how perfectly He formed each one. So truly awe-some & incredible!

Parenting is Best when Shared — & Your Marriage Will Forever Change

I heard this many times, but now I’ve been living it. Your marriage will never be the same as it was pre-babies!! This is a huge blessing & a wonderful thing, but it’s also a HUGE life change if you think you’ll be able to hang with friends til midnight {without paying for it at sunrise the next day!) or go on spontaneous dates or enjoy weekend getaways without some premeditated planning.

Also, once your sweet babies turn 2 (as mine just did), flying just got a whole lot more expensive. Travel hassles takes on a whole new meaning. Delayed flights that you carefully scheduled around naptime no longer seem like NBD — they can become a parents’ nightmare. Long road trips can take 2x as long & be many times messier (& louder). Packing & lugging around items for your little people isn’t all that fun either, especially when they need to go potty/get their diaper changed, are often hungry & thirsty, don’t want to nap when they need to, & jump all over the plane / train / automobile 😀 Oh what fun!

The stress it puts on you & your spouse to move from loving, romantic partners to coworkers of raising humans is a MASSIVE leap that simply takes time to adjust to. You’ll eventually figure out who’s better at changing diapers, giving baths, brushing teeth, making your baby smile, or warding off a tantrum! You’ll have fun, you’ll probably be edgy with each other (especially at 3am when the baby wakes AGAIN & you’re deciding who will get her this time or who gets to sleep in this morning / who’s had the least sleep). 😉

But as with any life change, you’ll both start to realize this is “your new normal”, become more flexible, & appreciate the perspective that having little ones provides!

Raising a daughter has done more to reveal my husband & my strengths (oh yes, & weaknesses) than anything else we’ve embarked on in our marriage thus far. You also learn the true value of TEAMWORK, compromise, & serving each other! Meeting both of your needs takes on a whole new level of importance because if you two are sinking, the WHOLE SHIP goes down with y’all. As parents, we must learn how to care for our babies without drowning ourselves!

Thankfully, my hubby & I are reaching a good place at this 2-year mark. Some things we’ve learned:

1. We must prioritize our marriage, or our daughter will always vie for 1st place!
2. To put each other 1st as best we can.
3. We must respect our own limitations, or things go south quickly 🙂
4. What we truly need in life & what we can do without.
5. How to help each other thrive in the midst of the {sometimes} chaotic & unpredictable journey that is parenting.
6. Making decisions out of convenience & for the sake of our well-being is a GREAT IDEA — usually! {Amazon Prime, I’m looking at you}.
7. Hiring help — a nanny/babysitter, house cleaner, meal delivery service, whatever — is excellent & WORTH IT.
8. How you feel 1 day may change completely the next. Seasons change fast as new parents — & I can’t imagine how quickly they go from here on out. One day you think you’ll never stop changing diapers, the next your kid is begging to use the potty & wants to put on her “big girl panties” {tear emoji! This is happening in our house}. Suddenly having a new baby seems doable {also crazy haha}… because we’re sleeping through the night most nights & teething for the most part is behind us. HOORAY! {Also, where did my chubby baby go?} :*(
9. We both need regular breaks — little ones every day, a weekly one (sabbath!), & date nights regularly. We also need to GET AWAY from home & even our sweet, precious daughter to gain much-needed romantic time together, get invaluable perspective on what we’re doing {raising a girl to love Jesus & people with her whole heart!}, rekindle our hearts & sense of ADVENTURE, relax!, & remember that we’re not only parents {though it’s our favorite role ever!}. ♥♥

When you’re in the day-to-day of raising a little one, it’s very easy to slip into the mentality of thisisallthereis/mylifewillneverbethesame.

Nooo. Once you start down this track, you must pull back & take a vacay from being a mom or dad. You are more than this “Mommy” or “Daddy” role in your life 🙂

But there is nothing more beautiful you’ll ever do than create & love & raise someone to be a light in this world!! Trust me, having children will be one of the sweetest roles you’ll ever have the privilege & honor of experiencing in your lifetime.

Thank you, Abigail Love, for coming into our lives!! You are the best thing to ever happen to us this side of Jesus & marriage, and Daddy & I are forever grateful & wildly in love with you!

And thank You Jesus for the gift of our precious daughter. May we love her well ALL the days of her life & help her become the person You created her to be. In Jesus’ name, amen. ♥♥♥